Make Sure You Are Absolutely Positronium

Let me come out and admit that one of my passions is comic books. I have run the emotional gambit on this subject for years, from early teen ecstasy at the multicolorworlds unfolding, to mid-teen speculator greed where I grasped for every first crappy issue I could seal into a bag, to late teen shame and complete avoidance, to college year snobbery where I recognized the format but rejected most of the mainstream riff-raff, to finally full circle acceptance of the inherent geekiness of both the medium and myself. Over the years the one comic that I have collected through thick and thin was the Incredible Hulk. I think I identify with the nerdy Bruce Banner and experience some sort of masculine catharsis with each transformation into the raw Id that is the Jade Goliath: power incarnate and unshackled by any of the rules of society. Not even the laws of physics.

As a quick primer to the comic book impaired (i.e., those of you with lives), Bruce Banner was transformed into the Incredible Hulk when he was caught in the blast wave of a gamma-ray bomb explosion. These gamma rays are what make him green as well as all of his various gamma-ray powered rivals, like The Abomination or The Leader. Great and good, except it doesn't take much physics to know that gamma radiation is merely the highest energy type of light, not some exotic ray or particle. Any atomic bomb produces gamma radiation and as the people of Hiroshima and Nagasaki know, you do not get super powers from gamma-rays. You get sick and dead. Still, even if we grant that in the comic book world radiation will give you super powers a good 50% of the time, what exactly is a Gamma Bomb?

By the time the first Gamma Bomb had gone off (May 1962), the H-bomb had already been in existence vaporizing South Pacific islands for a decade, and as far as I know, those are about the most gamma-ray intensive sources ever created. Was Dr. Banner working on some sort of low-heat explosion, i.e. a bomb that would put out almost all of its energy in the form of gamma-rays? Such a bomb would be similar in concept to a Neutron Bomb, which sacrifices total energy yield to put out a higher dose of initial radiation (in the form of neutrons). This sort of weapon will cause less infrastructure destruction, but be more deadly to things vulnerable to radiation. Like people. Oh, Bruce... the pursuit of science does not mean leave your soul at the door.

What brought all this to mind was a recent scientific discovery that might be used to one day make gamma-ray lasers (also known as Grasers or to the Dr. Evils of the world, Gamma Ray Annihilation Lasers). Laser is actually an acronym meaning Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation. The key to that is the "Stimulated Emission" which means that when light of the right wavelength hits the inner parts of the laser it stimulates the production of more light of the same wavelength, which then moves "coherently", i.e. all the light waves move together, not interfering with each other. Your basic laser works by "pumping" up a medium (a ruby in the very first laser) to an excited state. Once in the excited state every photon of light it emits makes more photons which all run together, bouncing around the medium until you get a cascade of light that comes out in the laser beam, across the theatre, and onto Kevin Bacon's chin. Would you cut that out, I am trying to watch a movie here!

Gamma-ray lasers would in principle work the same way, only the energy of a gamma ray is roughly 5000 times greater than your typical optical light. This kind of energy requires quite a special excited medium, which up until now has eluded physicists. Your typical atom can't give you much more than ultraviolet light energy, as any more energy just blows electrons off atoms -- not so great for making a laser.



The hot discovery this week is the creation of di-positronium. Positronium (without the "di") has been around for a long time. Well the typical piece of positronium only lasts a picosecond, but the ability to make them has been around a long time. A positron is the anti-matter, mirror-world version of an electron. Every piece of matter has an anti-matter opposite. If you combine a positron and an electron, they generally annihilate each other, producing a lot of energy. However, sometimes they combine for a short while in a weird element known as positronium. It is just like Hydrogen, an electron orbiting a single positive bit, except it is much less heavy and about to explode. Since at best positronium only exists for a microsecond it has been tricky to make any molecules out of it, but researchers in Riverside, CA managed to get two to stick together into di-positronium (using this pictured apparatus), the bizarro world version of common Hydrogen gas. Apparently it is this stuff that scientists think could potentially be used as the medium for a gamma-ray laser.

"The difference in the power available from a gamma-ray laser compared to a normal laser is the same as the difference between a nuclear explosion and a chemical explosion." - Dr. David Cassidy^

Yikes. Still, one needs to be careful making such strong claims. If things don't work out you might end up looking like a bit of an ass:

Once we get out of the '80s, the '90s are going to make the '60s look like the '50s!" - Dennis Hopper, Flashback (1990)

Yeahhhh... Not so much.



One thing I know for sure, with the Hulk around drywallers must have been in constant demand. Hulk smash puny wall! Now gaping hole makes hulk laugh. Hmmm, Hulk feels chill breeze and no longer have place to hang Hulk pictures. Plus aesthetically displeasing. Hulk angry again! Must call contractor to fix wall! Smash! Two walls need fixing?! How hulk gonna pay for all this? Smash...

And so on.



Barring the unexpected appearance of the Hulk, or maybe just an angry teen or two, our walls should be in good shape, with drywall now up everywhere. Again, I am a bit behind in my house remodel updates, so these walls went up three weeks or so ago. These are the first, raw photos before the taping and plastering. Drywall is on the list of things that require inspections from the city, I guess so walls and ceilings won't collapse on you in your sleep. The city requires a nail every so many inches or the drywall does not pass inspection. Only after this inspection do you tape up all the gaps/cracks and start slapping plaster on to produce one smooth surface (see next week's blog entry).



Anywhere you might expect water could leak or drip or spray, we have put in green board drywall, a Hulk favorite. In theory this drywall is more resistant to water damage, as it covers the gypsum drywall base with a tasty wax coating, as opposed to just paper. In practice it is not supposed to do much that 2 or 3 coats of paint won't do for you, but builders use it to play it safe. If a leak rotted out a wall behind a sink and it was not green board there would be hell to pay. You can see the green board in the bathroom and in the next frame in our kitchen.

For the curious: you do not want to use green board in showers or behind bathtub tile, i.e. places that seriously get wet. You use a water proof cement board, which will not crumble into dust if it gets wet. I may or may not show photos of cement board in a later tile installation entry. Probably not, as it looks a lot like a cement board. Let your imagination frolic, if it will.



Still, getting the drywall up was one of the big "Oh Wow" moments in the house remodel. Where before there were frames, after there were walls again. It is like the difference between a skeleton and a person with skin. Except putting the skin on and off is decidedly less unpleasant. I mean, I assume. Our serial killer readership can chime in with their own opinions.

It looks like we can't have it both ways. I am only one man with only so much time available for procrastination. If I work to get more remodel stuff in the blog, there is just no room for babies. I can't please everyone and it is tearing me apart!

Actually, I just ran out of photos on my laptop, both house remodel and babies. Too lazy to get the more recent ones Candice has taken, I leave you with the last picture I have from our San Diego vacation. I call it "Get a Haircut!" or alternatively, "Maybe a Little More Exercise Is in Order, Mmmm?" Nope, no one likes pictures of themselves. Well, maybe Brad Pitt does. Damn you Angelina, why can't you share him with the world?



^PS - When exactly did David Cassidy get so involved with high energy physics? I mean we are talking about the man who sang The Puppy Song, for goodness sakes.

If only I could have a puppy
I'd call myself so very lucky
Just to have some company
To share a cup of tea with me
I'd take my puppy everywhere
La la la la I wouldn't care